Merry Christmas to all! This is my shortest Blog, and will not contain anything- except that I am headed, after church sunday morning, to Maine for a week to visit family, and friends, and to take a quick vacation before I get married!
God bless everyone, may you celebrate the holidays in wonderful ways and experience the true Spirit of the season as you never have before!
Blessings- Merry Christmas!!
Holy cr*p, man! It's been so long since I've posted- I guess i'm just working too hard.
Ok, so- I've been thinking of this a lot. I went to Kingdom Bound a few years back (was it really back in 99? I'm so freaking old) and if you know much about it, you know that it takes place at Six Flags in Darien Lake. Which means- you guessed it- dippin' dots. No, seriously, tho- it means roller coasters. Everyone's favorite coaster is, of course, the Superman- ride of steel. Because it makes them feel like they're what- superman? yeah right- if only I had real x-ray vision so I could see what's in my christmas presents- hehe.
Anyway, I was thinking about this the other day, and I was thinking about what kind of a ride my youth was, and I've decided something- for a person who personally does not do many roller coasters, I certainly seemed to (and still sometimes still do) enjoy the roller coaster life. If you were a Christian teen, you know what I mean- go to a conference and you're up- but you get home and your family really p*sses you off (I have a friend who'd hit me if i actually said the word p*ss) and you'd be back down again- and you'd go to camp and keep your devotions up for a little while, and you'd be down in the "valley" again.
I've realized a few things- first- this is not what we were meant for. We were not bought out of sin and slavery by Christ so we could be up and down in our lives with him. He did not die for us so that we could live for him after Acquire the Fire, and then get back down after we're home for a week in the "real world".
I was a co-leader of a prayer group in my high school- and it was really funny my sophomore year because we took a whole freaking busload of kids to Acquire the Fire in Providence, Rhode Island- and after ATF, we had our attendance in our prayer group skyrocket- it was like- have a real meeting. And peopel were interested- and... yeah- but within a few weeks, our final number of people that we increased was maybe a couple... And friends of mine in other schools and towns who went on the trip with us felt as though they wanted to start their own prayer groups in their school- most of them lasted for a couple months maybe before they just died entirely.
Point being- we were not intended for continually going up and down, and being on the roller coaster. There is more to being a Christian than this.
Another thing I've realized along side of that is this- if we do not kill the roller coaster habit, we will do no better than that. If we do not find a way to stay full of passion, zeal and vigor, then we will be destined to go up and down at the absolute best- with many who do not even stay at doing that well and just end up in the valley all the time. I am not saying that we are not allowed to feel overextended and make sure we take time to nurture ourselves, but i'm saying that if we do not kill the habit, it will be habit and we will do no better.
Finally- the last thing worthy of note here is this- it is not easy! Many of us- a generational thing, i'm sure- are looking to get by without having to work hard. people are looking for a job where they can sit and do no strenuous work- they want to do something that dosn't require them to think hard- they want ease. That's why in the movie Office Space, the protagonist says, "I did nothing all day long- and it was everything I thought it could be" and why his dream of what he can do with his life is nothing.
We do not want to work hard, and in the spiritual world it is no different- but it requires hard work for anything in the natural- feeling of accomplishment after a job well done, a marriage- needs HARD work-, getting through school- anything. So how much more should we expect hard work in the thing that is worth anything- living a spiritual life conforiming to Christ and reaching out to our friends.
It is not easy, it is not for the faint of heart- it takes work, practice, and ultimately- a lot of determination- along with our "faith". I am not saying you are saved by works, i'm saying that if we are to cultivate spiritual growth in ourselves, we cannot just sit by and wait for God to impose that into our brains as though we will then just magically get it.
A friend of yours is going through a rough time. do you:
a. Listen to your friend's problem. Then, when it seems clear that the person has said what he/she needs to say and gotten out what he/she needs to get out, analyze the situation and offer sound advice for the person to follow.
b. Sit there while the person is talking and begin formulating your response to the person's problem so that when he/she tells you what he/she needs to tell you, you can quickly respond and hopefully have solved the problem.
c. Listen to the person and then offer him/her some phrase as comfort, such as "It will all be ok." or "Remember that God is in control, and He knows what He's doing." Something to that effect, hoping to help the person feel comforted in his/her situation.
d. Listen to the person share his/her problem. Then say nothing to the person regarding the solving of said problem and just be there to be with the person.
So what would you do? Now- what is the ideal for what you should do?
Now, shoot me if I'm wrong, but- the answer is D. I think most of us would agree that B is not a good option- because it doesn't even really involve listening to the person. But both A and C, while they may seem to be good options, are not correct.
I was thinking the other day as I was going through my normal life of something, and someone said something to me that made me think, "ok- that couldn't possibly be any more of a cliche!" And it got me to thinking of this- Christians are notoriously problem solvers! Not that being a problem solver is necessarily a bad thing, but when someone is going through a rough time, often times they do not need their problem solved. Often times we really need someone to "cry" with us, or an ear to listen to us, or...
Let me relay a story. The last person I dated before meeting the woman of my dreams who will be my wife in less than 2 months (can't wait!) broke up with me. Surprise, surprise- that's probably the biggest reason why we're still not dating- breaking up will do that to a relationship (hehe- it's a joke). But after she broke up with me and I was kinda hurting, I had everyone tell me some wonderful advice- stuff like "God's got someone better for you" and "You're better off without her" and... stuff like that- and while that may have been VERY true (particularly the first one), they are all cliches that I did not need to hear at that point in time. What I needed was what my friend Timmy gave me- an ear to listen, to affirm what I was doing, and to not feed me phrases i've heard a dozen times, or courses of action I could have come up with on my own.
Timmy and I then got talking, and I was complaining about how much people just gave me lines that I didn't need to hear AGAIN, and he and i got talking. Why is is that we always feel like we need to help people and solve their problem? Say the right words and make the person go from sad to happy. It is the Lord who will turn the person's mourning into dancing, not us- but we feel like we're the best way to help a person turn away from the sadness he/she is feeling.
But what if that feeling is necessary? The sadness is needed- and could easily build them up into a better person, or... sorry- that's a cliche in and of itself- the whole character building issue.
So the next time someone has a problem, then why don't we move more quickly to the listening stage and hold off on the advice stage, the cliche stage, or the "let me do what everyone else is doing and try to make you go from sad to happy." As if it will work now because you're doing it, even though so many others have tried, or will try after you. It seems everyone is trying to solve the problem of those who deal with them.
everybody's doing it... doing it... doing it- picking it and chewing it, chewing it, chewing it... thinking it's bubble gum but it snot.
(sorry, just the random phrase that popped into my head to close this- a chant my brothers and i used to quote when we were young)
